


www.hummingbees.org

by elijah_was_a_prophet



Category: Original Work
Genre: For Science!, Gen, In-Universe Documents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:00:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27093193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elijah_was_a_prophet/pseuds/elijah_was_a_prophet
Summary: From the blog of Denice Savard, PhD.
Relationships: Cursed Forest & The Cryptids who Inhabit It
Comments: 14
Kudos: 11
Collections: Fic In A Box





	www.hummingbees.org

**Author's Note:**

  * For [architeuthis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/architeuthis/gifts).



## Welcome to My Blog!

My grandfather, the Revered Waylon Savard, had one leisurely habit, and that was to fish in the clear cold waters of Trout Lake, down in the southern part of Mason County. Many in the town of Tall Mountain remember seeing him in his old Thunderbird, fishing poles hanging out the back window crammed next to nieces and nephews and grandkids with the old Coleman cooler laid across their laps to soak their playtime shorts damp with condensation. He always wore his Stetson hat, I remember, and thigh-high wading boots even though he only went ankle deep into the cattails on the side. All of us kids would run around on the shoreline while he stood steady in the mud and the weeds. There were stones to throw, slimy things to poke at, and if you sat real still the birds would perch in the aspens and sing. 

This break in formal language is to show that I know those woods around Trout Lake. I spent my childhood there, on old deer paths looking for elderberry bushes and, in the creeks, creeping slowly to catch spring peepers. So when I say that I believe in the old-times tale of hummingbees I am speaking from personal experience and knowledge, not the guessing and speculation of outsiders. I have seen their hives, delicate and jewel-transparent and humming with life. I have cut into their nests myself and drunk the runny honey found there. I have taken their eggs and hatched them in my garage only to watch them wither and die without their queen’s pheromones. They are real, and they are lovely, and I want to treasure them in the same way I treasure my memories of those woods. 

The purpose of this website is to lay out all the evidence, from beginning to end, everything from other people’s observations to my own sightings to what little exists in the academic literature describing these wonderful beings. Since no publication will accept my truths I have been forced to self-publish on this blog. This should not be used to discredit my work. How often have the innovators and inventors been seen as madmen? Instead, focus on the substance. How often we must overlook the wonderful things in our lives!

  
**> >CLICK HERE TO VIEW MY LATEST POSTS<<**

  
**> >CLICK HERE TO VIEW PICTURES OF TROUT LAKE<<**

  
**> >CLICK HERE TO READ ABOUT HUMMINGBEES<<**

  
**> >CLICK HERE TO READ ABOUT MASON COUNTY<<**

  
**> >LINK TO THE ACS SOUTHWESTERN CHAPTER WEBSITE<<**

  
**> >GUESTBOOK<<**

## Tuesday Thoughts: Some Historical Context

## 

By Denice Savard 9/15/2003

The earliest known reports of the hummingbees comes from Millard Snood, who came to the area of Trout Lake in the 1850s during one of the early gold rushes. At the time only source of water for the miner’s encampment were some of the natural springs in the aspens by the lake, and Millard talked years later in the book Tall Mountain: A History As Told By Its People about his early morning journeys with a bucket to those springs.

> _There wasn’t a water pump near the miner’s camp, and nobody wanted to drink out of the river since the panning always stirred up all kinds of muck and silt and made the water all cloudy. Nobody much wanted to get water, but it had to be done, and I started up a side venture of making a hike past the sandy beach down into the quaking aspens to fetch water for whoever would pay me, in gold dust, hardtack, or lamp oil. Pretty soon I was doing more bartering and repair work (being a tailor’s son had its own value) than I was mining.  
>  In my second year in the mining camp, the year the railroad surveys came through, is when I first saw the secret residents of those aspen woods. Funny little things, small enough to hold in your hands. Hummingbirds with bee’s wings and legs. Feathery if you reached out to touch one. I followed them through the aspen’s fresh green buds to their hive. I watched them crawl for a while before remembering the bucket in my hand and running to get the water. The next day I knew the path and I went back.  
>  Around the camp I asked if anyone else had seen them and in turn was mocked for being drunk. No matter my argument, my presentation of evidence, even bringing a hummingbird-honeybee back to camp in the glass of an empty lamp worked. It was as if something in their eyes clouded and they lost the ability to see the truth as it was. So I dropped the topic and instead worked at more useful pursuits, like setting up the first general stores in what would become Tall Mountain.  
>  But my love for those strange woodland creatures has not diminished. I’ve been walking every warm season to find their hives ever since that happy day when I saw them. No honey I’ve ever gotten from them, no beeswax. They have been my secret joy. Some people look for the first birds in the spring, and some look for the honeybees nudging their way through the clover, but I can see both._

Millard Snood was my great-great grandfather, maternal side. From him my family inherited the old family home in Tall Mountain, built by his general store money, and several cross stitch samplers his wife had sewn depicting hummingbirds and bumblebees swarming together over masses of spring and summer flowers. He must not have told her children where he went on those days, as neither his daughters Catalina, Maryanne, Nancy, and Elizabeth nor his sons James and Jack ever mentioned the hummingbees. This does not mean the trail runs cold, however, as beginning with the national parks movement nature lovers of all stripes began to flock to Trout Lake. Many reported seeing bees larger than any bee species they’d seen out east. In the grand scheme of melittology and scientific research, however, a bee that’s larger than normal in a small forest by an unremarkable lake is not the top priority. In 1938 the entomologist Gene Hubbard made a survey of Colorado’s social insect species, and in the appendix of his book recorded a note about ‘strange tales from Tall Mountain, Mason County’ but appears to have regarded these stories as curiosities of the old days and not recorded fact. His report comes from my great-grandmother, Florence Snood, who talked about going south of Trout Lake with her grandfather to see the bird-bees when the first aspen leaves opened. Aside from her and Millard, however, not many people in the family have been interested in investigating the stories. 

Personally, I have always been fascinated by the tales, stemming from when I first saw the hummingbees brushing at wildflowers on a hot summer day when I’d pushed deep into the aspens chasing the fluffy tail of a rabbit. I traveled all the way to Florida to get my doctorate studying bees (see ‘Osmia ribifloris in Commercial Blueberry Cultivation’) but was not taken seriously by the entomologists or the ornithologists when I proposed my research project into the woods near my hometown. They’d always had an attitude about me there, I felt, and so I left for Colorado again and a research position with the Mason County wildlife management office. 

It left me plenty of time to dream about my hummingbees, sitting in a plain cubicle fielding calls about swarms and varroa mites. This entire document was typed on the old computer there, on 1998 Word with my notebook propped so I could slam it closed the minute anyone came in. I faced a lot of opposition, on the rare occasion that I brought my side project up. The refusal to even consider my evidence became so intense I was banned from mentioning hummingbees at all in the office. But I am not the first. Once the internet opened for mass consumption, I was able to contact a retired forester, one Mr. Dana Ford. Back in his wild youth days he’d been one of the Tall Mountain Freaks, a group of hippies whose van broke down on the main road through Mason County. He said he saw the hummingbees, clear as day, but that everyone had blamed them on the LSD before continuing to turn their van into their new home. That was the year I was born, and the same year they condemned the old pier on Trout Lake’s southernly Aspen Beach and built a new one up where the scrub pines sat. 

I am much obliged to Mr. Ford for his help in locating the hive sites over the past three months, and to the members of the Southwestern Chapter of the American Cryptozoological Society for fundraising a week long research expedition into the aspen woods this past summer, the results of which should help the population recover immensely. It was a real pleasure to have all of you in Tall Mountain, and I hope that this November when Mr. Simmonds goes looking for the fuzzy pond skimmer that I can come along. 

## About Mason County

By Denice Savard 

_Why do you talk about Mason County so much? Isn’t this site supposed to be about hummingbees???_

So begins one of the first emails I ever received from a reader of this site. And he has a point, doesn’t he? Why are so many of my Tuesday Thoughts posts about things I’ve seen on Main Street in Tall Mountain, or how the flowers are blooming this June, or how many inches of snow we got in the past week? Some people get very annoyed when I don’t post the latest research but instead talk about the sunset, and they point out that if I tried to publish my ramblings on fly fishing on Aspen Beach to a scientific journal that I’d be rejected.  


Well first off, this is not a scientific journal. This is one of many sites on the cryptozoology webring, all maintained by hobbyists, all at differing levels of complexity and formality and range. Richard Hutchinson’s astonishingly comprehensive directory on Bigfoot dwarfs something like this site. They have a forum with moderators and active threads and a regular panel of writers and contributors. I know most of my commenters by name. Jon4828, CassieWilder, BlueSquirrelMountain… I know all of you well from our years of correspondence. Being casual among a group of peers is different then when I send something off for publication.  


To answer the question of why I talk so much about Mason County: Mason County is the hummingbees. Without everything that surrounds me and them in this place neither of us would be the same. I have often spent hours simply walking under the aspens watching them work and build. The introduction to this website is about my own memories of this place. Memories have been handed down from my great-great grandmother down to me, memories which were the first to make me curious. There is a triangle between me, the land, and the hummingbees. I cannot think of one without the others.  


Whew! That was a lot of words without even covering where we’re talking about.  


Mason County is in Western Colorado, south of Gunnison County and north of Hinsdale County. At last census around four thousand people lived here, half of them in the county seat of Lakeview. Tall Mountain has a population of around four hundred, accessible only by Country Road 234 off the stretch of McGregor Pass between Lakeview and Crested Butte. There is a post office, a church, a general store, and a small bed and breakfast for the tourists who think that Lakeview is too crowded. It is one of the most splendidly isolated places in the lower 48, a fact which is both frustrating and rewarding in equal measure. The land is beautiful, but everyone’s so isolated they’re constantly in one another’s business, a fact which has made much of my research difficult. After the fifth or sixth time someone finds you wandering through the aspens with a notepad and a varroa mite fogger rumors spread.  


Across 234 from Tall Mountain is Trout Lake. The area is wet, and most people prefer the smaller lakes to the east of the town as they have better trails instead of a slick dirt slope through waist high underbrush. There is a sandy strip on the western side, Aspen Beach, but that requires an extended walk through the woods. There is an old cabin on the Aspen Beach access trail, but the owner is an old grump and usually must be bribed to let people use his dock. Even further from the main road is Pine River, the feeder for Aspen Lake. It’s far up an unstable gravel face and surrounded by pines so hummingbird research doesn’t have to go out that far.  


The bulk of my research takes place south of the lake, in the aspen woods the beach is named after. Aspens reproduce through suckers or seedlings from their roots, meaning that (if Dana is correct) the bulk of the forest all came from one tree! When seen in conjunction with Dr. Erica Hoffman’s theories on massive organisms as independent brains and the opening cryptobotanist field of PPI, or plant psychic intelligence, the implications are staggering. Perhaps in the future when the Society develops the epsilon wave reader we’ll be able to find out the mysteries of the woods.  


In addition to the aspens a variety of other animals and plants call the area their home. About a mile south of Trout Lake the Hoag River is dammed into the Hoag lake by a resident beaver colony. Herds of elk and deer sometimes come through, and large numbers of songbirds share the trees with the hummingbees. Despite not being a typical entry into the ecosystem the hummingbees seem to not upset the balance-aside from the absence of other, typical pollinators as a result of the hummingbees filling that niche.  


Some of the site’s guest posts have more detailed information on the wildflower life around Trout Lake, but in general the most common tend to be the yarrows, columbines, and lupines. Pictures of all of these, as well as general pictures of the Trout Lake area and Tall Mountain, are available on the photos tab of this website. And if you are ever in the area, stop in and say hello! Most town residents will be happy to point you towards the old Savard house.

## About the Hummingbee

by Denice Savard 

The hummingbee is a uniquely singular creature, the fusion of a hummingbird and a bee. Larger than the average honeybee, it never the less maintains a similar life cycle and eusocial behavior instead of behaving as a solitary animal the way a hummingbird would. Despite this unique blending of invertebrate and vertebrate characteristics I have still put them in the class Aves, as they have feathers, a spinal cord, and are warm-blooded. Furthermore, as hummingbirds, they belong in the order Apodiformes and the family Trochilidae. To sort them further required the creation of a new genis, Ornisapis, or bee-bird, with the species melliovus referring to their honey colored eggs.  


The hummingbee is a social species, with a multi-queen system not dissimilar to that of Parachartergus colobopterus, in which workers compete for queen positions based on current queen numbers. Unlike honeybees hummingbird queens and workers are morphologically identical, meaning that any female which manages to avoid suppression can become a queen. Suppression occurs when workers destroy the eggs of other workers in order to promote the resources available for their queen and their brothers. Often in times of colony distress larger than usual piles of punctured eggs will be found under hives as workers try to become queens at the same time as suppression becomes vital.  


The average hummingbee is around three inches long, with a feathery body and keratin beak. In place of feather and bone wings it has the clear ones typical of bees. On its underside are two legs, structured like a bee’s hind legs with downy pollen baskets. The beak is aided by two maxilla, folded inside the mouth during flight, along with a bristled tongue. Typical plumage is green with a white underbelly; neither males nor females have the brightly colored gorget associated with hummingbirds.  
Hummingbees are fast flyers, averaging around eighty six wingbeats per second. They have a good sense of smell, as evidenced by their ability to locate and feed on green or otherwise less noticeable flowers and appear to also have the average hummingbird’s ability to sense color. Their acute vision is further proven by how easily they can orient themselves and avoid obstacles even at their high speed.  


They do not buzz in flight, since their wings do not beat fast enough to create the sound. They can, however, sing like any other bird. Each hive has its own individual tune, and one of the most fascinating phenomena observed was in 1999, when two hives split and developed their own variants of the base melody within a few days. Singing is thought to be a way to establish territory and ward off hives who venture into their territory.  


Predators of the hummingbees appear to consist mostly of small birds of prey, which are used to eating hummingbirds, and during initial stakeouts during the 2001 season several fish were spotted leaping out of the water to catch low-flying specimens. Varroa mites have been a concern in past years, especially since they can easily slide between feathers and avoid detection when disturbed. Regular preventative measures have been taken to address this situation.  


The hives are a beautiful thing to behold, made of saliva, spider’s silk, and plant material. When fully built they can wrap all the way around an aspen a foot deep and crawling with life. The top third is where honey can be found, the middle third is where the colony overnights, and the bottom third has a bubbling appearance to reflect the small cupped cells that hold eggs. The presence of honey is often a surprise despite the bee aspect; people assume that the bird aspect means that they’re prevented from consuming it. But since unlike regular hummingbirds the hummingbee does not fly south for the winter it requires this overwinter source of food. During the winter months I go and check on the hives, pushing layers of snow aside to listen to the tiny rustles of the living workers and queens moving within.  


One point which has led to a lot of questions is what the ‘mummified’ total count means. This refers to how many specimens died over the winter months. To avoid opening the hive and losing valuable heat deceased hummingbees are put into the bottom third along with debris and the congealed remains of spoiled or overheated honey. This all gums together into a gray wrapped mass, which is pushed out of the hive when warmer days come and the bottom third has to be cleaned for egg laying to begin again. I thought the bodies resembled mummies, and that’s what I’ve called them ever since.  


From the eggs in the bottom third hatch regular nestlings, which are fed by the workers until they can leave and begin their own works. Often they can be spotted by their unsteady flying as they adjust to the new outside world. During summer when reproduction rates are the fastest I can sit next to the hive (hummingbees have no stingers) and count the new ones as a way to estimate total population. When combined with a count of the dead population, easily counted by their location in a mortuary pile, the average replacement rate can be determined. Lifespans are around a year.

#### American Cryptozoological Society

##### Top 5 FAQs

###### How can you believe any of this?

Because we have the data to back it up. Many among our ranks are scientists, with degrees from top ranked universities and the publications to prove it. The entire board is made up of PhDs. Our regular conferences are attended by the same people that attend more legitimate gatherings. Authors cited in our society publication are frequently found cited in those publications with better reputations. It is not a matter of belief, it is a matter of proof. A great deal of the world’s truths are concealed so craftily as to have them be believed to be insane conspiracies. Here at the society, we work to try and separate the wheat from the chaff, the nonsense from the science, what’s facts and what’s fiction.

###### I think that you’re crazy/delusional/insane/etc.

A common response. If you’re so convinced, then try approaching us with an open mind. Don’t think about what you know should be true, think about what you’re actually seeing. Let the fog lift from your eyes. And if you still don’t see it, it’s not your fault. But that doesn’t mean we will tolerate disrespect.

###### What is clouding? Why is this such an issue for cryptozoologists?

Clouding refers to a near-universal phenomenon where the presence of cryptids is ignored, forgotten, or simply unknown even in situations where proof seems obvious or irrefutable. All too often skeptics challenge cryptozoologists for proof of our creatures, only to look at the evidence and proclaim that they don’t see it. This frustrating cycle of research, ridicule, and then more research is not the fault of the cryptozoologists but rather is a natural phenomenon. Although research into it has been limited (the researchers keep forgetting what they were studying as soon as they start) certain mixes of supplements and OTC medication, while not 100% effective, at least keep scientists and researchers from forgetting what’s in their own data.

###### How can I contribute to the Society?

Membership in the Society is a yearly 50 dollar fee, which includes access to our newspaper and an online version of our quarterly scientific journal. If you’d like to become a research partner with us, volunteer your time to our in person events, work with leading cryptozoologists in hands on projects, or just meet other enthusiasts please examine our website directory for further details.

###### I’ve discovered a new cryptid! Now what?

Congratulations! Please refer to our organizational page to discover your regional chapter and contact them, as they have the best chance of being able to allocate resources to confirm the discovery. Upon successful proof of a new cryptid it will be entered into the Society database along with a unique catalog number, to aid in internal documentation. From there we often ask that you aid us in conducting research, be it your own personal work or simply hosting Society professionals on their regular expeditions into new and exciting territories.

## Tuesday’s Thoughts: SPECIAL GUEST POST

By Dana Ford 1/5/2004

Howdy all. Since Denice is down in San Diego for the American Entomological Society’s conference presenting her paper on black queen cell virus (that I read and couldn’t make heads or tails of) I’ve been given the duty of writing this week’s Tuesday’s Thoughts. I don’t have the same writing skills as Denice, but I do have a lot of data about the hummingbees that I’ve been collecting, and some other fun numbers for you people to look at. I first went down to Tall Mountain in 1998, but since it was only a partial season, I’m starting the data with 1999.

Hummingbee Populations, 1999-2003 Year | Hive Number | Dead Count | Mummified Count  | Stony Fungus Count  
---|---|---|---|---  
1999 | 5 hives | 122 | 12 | 3  
2000 | 5 hives | 141 | 15 | 5  
2001 | 7 hives | 103 | 6 | 8  
2002 | 4 hives | 209 | 41 | 2  
2004 | 4 hives | 110 | 17 | 3  
Climate Data For Tall Mountain, 1999-2003 Year | Summer High | Summer Low | Last Frost | First Frost | Average Precipitation | Average Snowfall  
---|---|---|---|---|---|---  
1999 | 81 | 43 | May 1 | October 15 | 10.41 | 44.60  
2000 | 80 | 42 | May 8 | October 22 | 10.01 | 45.10  
2001 | 79 | 39 | May 13 | October 11 | 11.31 | 45.60  
2002 | 84 | 44 | April 28 | October 29 | 9.89 | 42.98  
2003 | 80 | 43 | May 3 | October 23 | 10.12 | 44.72  
  
As you might can tell, there was a massive population boom in 2001 followed by a sudden and dramatic decrease the following year. That was the original purpose of that summer’s trip, to determine why the numbers of dying hummingbees were on an upswing and how it could be prevented.  


Unfortunately, it appears that much of the variation is out of our control. One of the areas in which Denice and I have been working and researching is the symbiosis between stony fungus and the hives. Stony fungus is our informal name for the hard masses of gray bracket fungi that appear on and around hives, feeding on discarded organic material and providing a convenient perch for workers to sun themselves. Given the rapid decline in population when the fungus count went down, however, we’ve been thinking that there’s some chemical or biological relationship between the two.  


Another area we’ve been working on research in is wildflowers as nectar sources. Unlike regular hummingbirds, who prefer bright red flowers, hummingbees seem to have the improved sense of smell honeybees have and feed from a much wider range of flowers. Over the past several years I’ve done some field observations about their favorite flowers, including duration of visit and frequency of visit calculated per hour, done as an average across the day. With the aid of palynologist Dr. Jamie Freeman honey sample analysis was also conducted, the results of which are shown in the second figure by family and included for the benefit of the botanists in the audience.  


Observed Flower Species Scientific Name | Common Name | Average Visit Duration | Average Visit Frequency | Flowering Season  
---|---|---|---|---  
Achillea Millefolium | Common Yarrow | 4.5 | 10 | March-October  
Aconitum Columbianum | Columbian Monkshood | 5.1 | 8 | June-August  
Agastache Urticifolia | Horsemint Giant Hyssop | 5.4 | 11 | June-August  
Allium Cernuum | Nodding Onion | 2.3 | 5 | July-October  
Allium Schoenoprasum | Wild Chives | 1.3 | 2 | June-August  
Antennaria Rosea | Rosy Pussytoes | 0.9 | 1 | June-August  
Aquilegia Caerulea | Colorado Columbine | 4.9 | 9 | June-August  
Aquilegia Elegantula | Western Red Columbine | 5.1 | 9 | April-July  
Bistorta Bistortoides | American Bistort | 3.3 | 7 | May-August  
Chionophila Jamesii | Snowlover | 3.4 | 6 | June-August  
Collinsia Parviflora | Small-Flower Blue-Eyed Mary | 2.3 | 4 | March-July  
Dodecatheon Pulchellum | Darkthroat Shootingstar | 2.7 | 4 | May-August  
Epilobium Anagallidifolium | Alpine Willowherb | 3.9 | 6 | June-August  
Epipactis Gigantea | Stream Orchid | 5.0 | 2 | March-August  
Fritillaria Atropurpurea | Spotted Mountain Bells | 4.8 | 4 | April-July  
Hydrophyllum Capitatum | Ballhead Waterleaf | 5.3 | 10 | April-July  
Lonicera Involucrata | Black Twinberry | 4.8 | 11 | May-August  
Lupinus Argenteus | Silvery Lupine | 5.7 | 13 | May-April  
Mentha Arvensis | Field Mint | 3.6 | 9 | May-September  
Mertensia Arizonica | Aspen Bluebells | 3.4 | 12 | May-August  
Nasturtium Officinale | Watercress | 2.9 | 4 | March-November  
Paxistima Myrsinites | Mountain Lover | 3.3 | 6 | April-September  
Persicaria Amphibia | Water Smartweed | 2.5 | 5 | June-September  
Platanthera Dilatata | White Bog Orchid | 5.6 | 1 | June-August  
Pyrola Minor | Small Wintergreen | 3.1 | 4 | June-August  
Ribes Montigenum | Mountain Gooseberry | 5.8 | 14 | June-August  
Spiranthes Romanzoffiana | Hooded Lady’s-Tresses | 5.4 | 10 | July-October  
Symphoricarpos Albus | Common Snowberry | 5.5 | 12 | June-August  
Viola Adunca | Blue Violet | 3.2 | 5 | April-August  
  
Anybody who knows anything about plants is welcome to write in and talk about this data; I just didn’t want to subject you folks to my own bad writing. Well, that’ll be it from this old fart. Come on next week for Denise’s report on hummingbee queens.

### Official Fund Allocation Application

###### Applicant Name:

Dr. Denice Savard  


###### Location:

Tall Mountain, Colarado  


###### Name of Cryptid w/ Number:

Hummingbees, R#3849  


###### Purpose for Application:

Requesting funding for exploratory research trip into the aspen forest of Trout Lake, in order to make a study of the hummingbee’s habit and primary food sources.  


###### Goals of Project:

To determine the main nectar and pollen plants used by the hummingbees, to update their population count, and to determine how the population can be protected and maintained.  


###### Expected Monetary Need:

5,000 USD.  


Estimated Itemized Budget:  


  1. 3000 for travel expenses, including plane tickets for Mr. Marcus Elbridge and Mrs. Katherine Park
  2. 1000 for food (6 people x 7 days = ~23 dollars per day)
  3. 250 for gas (on-site only)
  4. 200 for notebooks, film, and other research materials
  5. 230 for non-resident 7-day fishing licenses
  6. 100 for sleeping bags (in lieu of formal lodgings expedition members will sleep in Dr. Savard’s living room)
  7. 150 for assorted consumables, including sunscreen, bug spray, hand sanitizer, etc.
  8. 40 for anti-clouding tablets (required to prevent confusion in hummingbee habitat)
  9. 20 for Mr. Dana’s nonresident boat license
  10. 10 to bribe JB Greenshaw so the expedition can use his dock



###### Other Society Personnel:

Southwestern Chapter Environmental Advisor Mr. Dana Ford, Mr. Marcus Elbridge, Mrs. Katherine Park, Entomological Chairman Dr. Troy Washington, and Sarah Yeong, MSc.  


The answers to the following questions are understood to be hypotheticals designed to assess funding applicants for their knowledge, ability to handle unexpected situations, and adherence with the Society’s standards. Please be up to date on all federal, state, and local laws before attempting research expeditions.  


###### 1\. While looking for your cryptid in a national park, a park ranger spots you and asks what you’re doing. How do you respond?

 _Hello, sir! I was just wondering where the restrooms were._

###### 2\. While presenting your paper on bigfoot theories one of your colleagues calls you an absolute moron. Which Society guideline is appropriate in this situation and why?

 _Section 1.3 states that name calling, insults, and other forms of shaming are inappropriate at Society functions. As cryptozoologists we already face enough shame and judgement from our family and friends; adding the shame into what’s supposed to be a safe environment is therefore inappropriate and cruel._

###### 3\. You are caught trespassing on private property and are sent to jail for the night. Who will pay your bail?

 _My brother, since he still owes me from the time I bailed him out._

###### 4\. In 150 words or fewer, summarize section 14.3 of the Society’s Right Conduct Code.

 _Up yours, buddy!_

In case of emergency, misadventure, or disappearance please list 3 emergency contacts below, at least one of which is not a blood relative.  


Charles Savard, 345 Kimmel Road, Tall Mountain, CO. 9704739874  


Bennie Rivers, 347 Kimmel Road, Tall Mountain, CO. 9703727894  


Starwolf Lavender, camper behind the Tall Mountain All Purpose, CO. No phone.


End file.
